A Deviated Septum is Nothing to Sneeze At

“Just shut up! Shut the fuck up!” Excuse me? Shut up, eh? Shut up? I’m going for a walk! Slam the door shut and I hear shouting from the other side. There are plenty of bars around here. I’m walking to the nearest bar! Belatedly, I realize no bar is open after midnight on a Sunday. I walk more and slowly begin to circle back. I sing to myself, choking back tears as I sing. Each step on the concrete pounding in my head, feeling like a march. It's a long way to Tipperary, It's a long way to go. It's a long way to Tipperary To the sweetest girl I know! Goodbye, Piccadilly, Farewell, Leicester Square! It's a long long way to Tipperary, But my heart's right there. Tears well as I sing and march. Where is Tipperary anyhow? I don’t know. But, it sounds like a nice place, doesn’t it? Yeah. I wish I was in Tipperary right now. I watch a bunny hop across the street and I smile. I think of nice bunnies and Tipperary. I still want to drink...

 iykyk  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1XVeiNALPsE

  “Floor 0 – Welcome – Stop the blood” in Esperanto & English https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ShPEPGGPasc

  TO EXTINGUISH FIRE WITHOUT WATER. Write the following words on each side of a plate, and throw it into the fire, and it will be extinguished forthwith: S A T O R A R E P O T E N E T O P E R A R O T A S – Long Lost Friend https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WSCgFephzsk

 Slovak for “Monsters and fear” https://youtu.be/g_mg7hEbVaM?si=8E1ExIsdqRsGJ289  

  My ex, whom you’ve heard so much about, was terrified of Detroit. As soon as we hit the exit ramp, he would press the lock button on his car three times. Oh my goodness, it’s Detroit, I might get shot! Hah. It’s fun to think Mr. Macho Über Dom was scared of Detroit. My boyfriend and I went on a nice little tour of my hometown the other day. I got to show him my old Elementary school, the vacant lot where my grandparent’s house once was, the Rite Aid that was once a burned down dollar store, the senior citizen’s apartments a family friend lived in, the supermercado that used to be a Farmer Jack and the elementary school I worked at. We even got to look around abandoned homes. There was a locked Masterlock dangling from the latch on a burned down house. Like the ad said, Masterlock truly is tough under fire. The lock was the only thing intact at that house. Peeking at another house it was a bit depressing. Half of the house was fire damaged and a mouse peeked out when I...

Well, I can tick that off the bucket list or I’m definitely over the ex. (2018-01-19 02:37) – private So Friday was a shitty day. The perfect kind of day to go to the bar after work and get wasted. There’s also the auto show and there are a lot of Germans visiting. This will be relevant soon. So, anyway I’m fairly drunk and a Puerto Rican and German walk into the bar. rimshot Didn’t even realize he was German at first. A rather attractive guy goes up to the bartender to get shots for his friend. Blonde hair, blue eyes, scruffy beard, average height. I overhear his accent and I’m instantly enamored. The concept of a bar tab was baffling to him and that makes him adorable. We chat a bit, but I don’t sit with him and his friend or anything. Me: Where are you from? I like your accent. Him: Vere do you tink I’m from? Me: I really have no idea, that’s why I’m asking. He smiles. Him: I am from Germany. We shake hands. He’s 41 and his name is Michael. I debate talki...