A Deviated Septum is Nothing to Sneeze At

  A very long three days to finally end up at [Hospital's] Behavioral Health Unit after 3 days in their crisis ER area. No roommate and hope it stays that way. Hijacked the extra pillow and blanket. Made an enemy right off the bat too. I arrived right at shower time and they were helping me get used to their system and this other woman was saying she was first and all. Frazzled and with low nicotine and testosterone and just belted out “Fuck it! Go ahead! I don't give a fuck!” or something to that effect and hoo boy.  “Do you know what it's like to have hemorrhoids?!?” She shouted.  “YES I DO!” I declared. “Itchy, painful and burns as fuck!!! SO GO FIRST!!” I shouted back. Been having trouble not having outbursts. Hoping that blows over. Been fortunate to have some pretty cool staff.  [The author would later eat those words] Wonder if it's the same hospital food or if we get anything different. Snack time was good, same stuff we're getting for lunch snacks dow...

 My friend and ally from the hospital, please contact me on Facebook. I came home to 10 new friend requests and I don't know what your name is on Facebook. >_<

 Just got out of the psych ward. Needed a checkup from the neck up. The first week was sheer hell. The second week was a bit better, a lighter form of hell. I had an ally on the inside, you see. I journaled extensively and I'll transcribe it all here over time. I'm titling these chronicles "Grippy Sock Yellows" a play on The Blues. Also because the hospital socks in my size were yellow and I detest yellow. I am doing better now, just adjusting to being back home. Fuck I missed music. Currently working on a Youtube playlist of all the songs and pop culture references I made in my journal. Find it here .

  In kindergarten, I came to the conclusion that I'm a boy. I'm not sure how schools are these days, but it was very much gender segregated at that time. The girls sat with the girls, the boys sat with the boys. When lining up for lunch or gym, we were in two separate lines according to gender. The girls didn't want to talk about cool stuff like bugs and Nintendo and dinosaurs. I was just endlessly frustrated that I never made a connection with any of the girls and many of them bullied me. One day, I came to the conclusion that I'm a boy. I approached the boy's table and said “I'm a boy now. Can I sit with you?” The head boy nodded solemnly and went to confer with the other boys. After a few moments, he returned and said I could sit with them. They accepted me as a boy despite my very girly holographic Minnie Mouse shirt. It was time to line up and I sat in the boy's line. The teacher huffed and approached me. “*deadname* That's the BOY'S lin...

“Just shut up! Shut the fuck up!” Excuse me? Shut up, eh? Shut up? I’m going for a walk! Slam the door shut and I hear shouting from the other side. There are plenty of bars around here. I’m walking to the nearest bar! Belatedly, I realize no bar is open after midnight on a Sunday. I walk more and slowly begin to circle back. I sing to myself, choking back tears as I sing. Each step on the concrete pounding in my head, feeling like a march. It's a long way to Tipperary, It's a long way to go. It's a long way to Tipperary To the sweetest girl I know! Goodbye, Piccadilly, Farewell, Leicester Square! It's a long long way to Tipperary, But my heart's right there. Tears well as I sing and march. Where is Tipperary anyhow? I don’t know. But, it sounds like a nice place, doesn’t it? Yeah. I wish I was in Tipperary right now. I watch a bunny hop across the street and I smile. I think of nice bunnies and Tipperary. I still want to drink...

 iykyk  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1XVeiNALPsE